February 15th - The Most Glorious Day of the Year - Uncover Ostomy
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February 15th – The Most Glorious Day of the Year

So apparently, February 15th is Singles Appreciation Day – a day where people can rejoice in the fact that they are happy being alone. Or at least, pretend to be. (Note that the acronym for this special day is S.A.D.) 

I purposely didn’t write a blog post yesterday for Valentine’s day because I’m single and I didn’t  have much to write about other than how I’m single..and that seemed too cliché. However, since today is S.A.D, it’s way way less so.

Don’t worry – I’m not going to complain about being single on Valentine’s day because being single on Valentine’s day this year was actually much better for me than it’s ever been actually being in a relationship for it.

2 years ago, the guy I was seeing at the time told me he didn’t want to spend any of the day with me, then showed up at my house with a cute teddy bear… and then left. Oh, but he did come back at, uh, midnight.

Cool bro.

1 year ago, I was pleasantly surprised to have received a lovely Tiffany necklace in the mail from my long distance boyfriend. However being in a long distance relationship, apparently, meant that I wasn’t allowed to do anything but stay home by myself for the night. I ended up buying more food than anyone could possibly consume in a week and ate it all while watching The Notebook for the first time.

Oh, and the guy took the necklace back when I broke up with him.

Surprisingly, as a single girl, this Valentine’s Day was the best Valentine’s Day I have had… ever.

Don’t get me wrong – I was still dressed head to toe in all black in obvious protest of the day and I still scoffed at the ridiculous Facebook picture posts of pictures and candy and chocolate from all the girls on my friends list – as the single girl, it felt necessary. Along with my decision to wear all black, I had also decided I was going to post-up in the local Starbucks to spend the night working late to keep myself busy and not sit at home and end up in another food coma in front of a ridiculous RomCom.

To my surprise, as I was wrapping up my work in the office to begin my relocation, I got a message from an old acquaintance on Facebook. He suggested that since everyone else was doing sometimes for Valentine’s Day that we should to.

So we went out for dinner. And it was lovely.

The reason why this post isn’t “woe is me because I’m single” (as most of my friends, I’m sure, would assume I’d write) is because I’m not down on myself for being single. In fact, I’m actually quite content being single.

These past few months I’ve had a great time going out, meeting new people, and dating around.

Ok, scratch that – I’ve been having a great time going out and meeting new people. Let me put it on record that I HATE. HATE. HATE. the act of dating and I’ve realized that more and more over the past few months of doing it.

I hate the superficial flirty date talk, I hate the not knowing about when to text/call the other person, and I hate the mind games that are associated. No, I don’t like it when you make a sarcastic flirty stab at me. No, you don’t need to not respond to my text message for 2 hours because you’re afraid of looking too eager. No, I don’t need you to act mysterious to keep me interested.

Tell me about who you are, why you are that way, and what you want to be in the future.  Respond to the question I JUST texted you in a reasonable manner because I’m obviously trying to have a conversation. And if you like me, be with me. If you don’t, don’t.

Is that too much to ask?

I’ve been wondering if I should just opt-in to that whole arranged marriage thing.

Well, not seriously. I think brides get traded for goats or something and I think I’m worth more than a goat.

And why does the guy get the goat? Why can’t I get the goat?

Ok, I digress.

The reason February 15th is the most wonderful time of the year is because the emphasis on the need to be in a relationship is gone. I don’t feel the need to be in one and I’m glad the day has passed. I’m happy with the way things are and I don’t need my entire world telling me relationships are the be all and end all to happiness.

Does that mean I don’t want to be in one? No, it does not.

What it means is that it’s going to take someone really special who can completely sweep me off my feet to convince me to be in one.

Or a goat.

Happy February 15th everyone- enjoy the half-priced chocolate.

Jessica Grossman
info@uncoverostomy.org
5 Comments
  • Francesco Oppedisano
    Posted at 02:01h, 16 February Reply

    I also hate all the mind games and the unwritten rules of dating, If you like the person tell them, call them the next day, just be yourself. Jess have you ever dated somebody with an ostomy?

    • Jess
      Posted at 04:16h, 17 February Reply

      Nope, I have never dated anyone with an ostomy.

      • Francesco
        Posted at 04:22h, 24 February Reply

        You should take a chance, Jess. I’m one of the good guys

  • Colm Ryan
    Posted at 02:52h, 16 February Reply

    Wow, what an open & frank insight. Thank you so much for sharing Jess. Here’s to better days! 🙂

  • Justin Taylor
    Posted at 04:04h, 16 February Reply

    I’ve actually been single since just before my colectomy and subsequent ileostomy a few years ago. What I like best about being single is the freedom that I have to make choices without having to consult with someone else beforehand. For example, I left my stable career as a graphic designer to return to pursue my RN so that I can become a WOCN. Something like that could have been a battle if it hadn’t been for the fact that I’m only responsible for me right now.

    Thanks for the post, and happy S.A.D.

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